Ever Get The Feeling You've Been Cheated? I Want My Money Back From These Concerts
After the Sex Pistols’ last gig in San Francisco, Johnny Rotten famously chided his audience, "Ever get the feeling you've been cheated?" In a series of notorious bad gigs, the Pistols delivered one of their worst.
It's an unfortunate rock tradition: great bands giving really bad concerts. Neil Diamond is the latest, having decided to refund money to fans who attended his show in Columbus, Ohio. Seems ol' Neil had laryngitis and thought he'd sing his way through a concert anyway. Of course. Why would a singer need a voice to sing? But I gotta give him props for having the integrity to give fans their money back. Most artists take the money and run.
I think all concerts should have a money-back guarantee. Given that the average ticket price is over 60 bucks these days, we should have some protection. I'm starting with these concerts — I want my money back for these live flops. They wasted my money and my time. Both are in short supply.
U2 - PopMart Tour
If you read my U2 post, you know I’m a fan. However, four Irish dudes stuck inside a giant lemon dressed up like the Village People is not my idea of a good time. I know, it was supposed to be a "rock spectacular" full of smart irony but still... give me U2 on a stage without a lemon or McDonalds arches. Refund, please!
VAN HALEN - Greensboro, 2007
Gimme my money back — and someone fire the soundman! David, Eddie, and the boys launched into "Jump," but the backing keyboard track was playing in the one key, while Eddie was playing in another. The whole thing is a train wreck beyond compare. Note to bands: it's okay to just stop the song, fix the problem, and start over.
BOB DYLAN - The "Never-Ending Tour"
Bob's "never-ending tour" needs to end. He's taken to playing nearly incomprehensible versions of his songs while perched behind an electric piano wearing a cowboy hat. He's like some folkie Yosemite Sam piano-bar singer impersonating Bob Dylan.
MADONNA - Any and Every Concert
I know I only have myself to blame but I want my money back for every Madonna tour. When will she learn that multiple costume changes, an overly exercised body, a chorus line of dancers, and some platitudes about peace and love does not make up for soul. Soul is at the center of a concert. Anything else is just a Vegas show.
THE POLICE - 2008 Reunion Tour
What was great about the Police in the '80s? They were three dudes playing tight rock tunes. Reunited in 2008, Sting insisted on turning them into some prog-rock version of the Police with rambling excursions.
*BAD CONCERT HALL OF FAME*
I wasn't at these concerts but they deserve a place in bad rock concert history.
GUNS 'N ROSES - Riverport Amphitheatre, 1991
It's the stuff of rock legend. Axl Rose jumps off stage, attacks a fan recording the show, and is pulled off him by securtity guards. He gets back on stage and says, "Well, thanks to the lame-ass security, I'm going home" then storms off the stage. A riot ensued, injuring dozens. I wasn't there, but if I were, I would want my money back.
ROLLING STONES - Altamont, 1969
Note to self: never hire the Hells Angels for concert security.
"FINAL" CONCERTS
And finally, any band that makes some huge deal about their "final" tour, asks their fans to shell out hundreds of dollars for the privilege, then reunites soon after should give everyone their money back. If it's the last time, make it the last time.May all your concerts be worth the money you shell out. I raise my lighter to you.
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Hey I saw Three Dog Night last year, they mixed in some humor with their good music, and it worked. They still got it.
And don't say final tour, and come back 3 or 4 times. Final tour means this is it, your hanging up.
Simply put if you can't do it anymore give it up! It should be about
the MUSIC not the MONEY!
To the writer, just a comment about the Sex Pistols: They've ALWAYS sucked. That's their sound from inception. That was real punk. Not glossed over punk like Green Day, Sum 41, Blink 182 etc. (the list goes on these days). If the Pistols DIDN'T suck, I'd be disappointed. Just an opinion...
Peace out people. So many people are so [profane]in' cruel to each other on these comment boards. Don't live to bearate others, please!
and the grass on the ground smellin' sweet
Move up the road to the outside of town
and the sound of that good gospel beat
Sits a ragged tent where there ain't no trees
And that gospel group tellin' you and me
It's Love Brother Love say Brother Love's traveling salvation show
Pack up the babies and grab the old ladies and everyone goes
'Cause everyone knows Brother Love's show
Room gets suddenly still and when you'd almost bet
You could hear yourself sweat he walks in
Eyes black as coal and when he lifts his face
Every ear in the place is on him
Startin' soft and slow like a small earthquake
And when he lets go half the valley shakes
It's Love, Brother Love say Brother Loves traveling salvation show
Pack up the babies and grab the old ladies and everyone goes
'Cause everyone knows 'bout Brother Loves show
(Halleluja) Brothers (Halle, halleluja) I say brothers
Now you got yourself two good hands
And when your brother is troubled you've gotta
reach out your hand for him 'cause that's what it's there for
And when your heart is troubled you've gotta reach out
your other hand, reach it out to the Man up there
'Cause that's what He's there for
Take my hand in yours
Walk with me this day
In my heart I know
I will never stray
Halle, halle, halle, halle, halle, halle, halle, halle
Love Brother Love say Brother Love's traveling salvation show
Pack up the babies and grab the old ladies and everyone goes
I say Love Brother Love say Brother Love's traveling salvation show
Pack up the babies and grab the old ladies and everyone goes
2006 summer . The singer
had a sound buzz through the song
These people DEFINITELY should give the people their money back for committing outright fraud. Most people want the "artist" ACTUALLY singing...rather than hiding their ineptitude behind choreography and costumes.
But the "worst gig" award has to go to a rock band called Wolf Spider (or something like that) who I had the misfortune to see play a local pub in Lancaster in 1989. They were so bad -- 40 year old guys wearing spandex pants with false wigs sounding like an out of tune and drunk Spinal Tap -- and the lead singer -- who sounded like the venerable Bob Dylan on helium gargling water -- thought that he was playing Wembley Stadium and kept asking us to put our hands in the air! There were about ten of us in the pub at the time, including four band members and the singers girlfriend. And, his girlfriend punched me when I shouted "Get off!"
But, at least, that gig was free of charge.
got paid for it and I still want a refund. People were going nuts like it was awesome. I thought they were terrible, Just awful. I like U2, they were NOT good at all that week. I fell asleep(no booze, no drugs) in the front row at a Kansas concert, BOOOORING! Saw B52's Mesopotamia tour. Mess is right. Front row seats. It was their first tour after their two year top of the world business ended.
NO ONE danced. The band looked like deer in the headlights, catatonic,
terrified. I really felt bad for them. I saw the Stones play Honky Tonk Woman twice. Once correctly, the second time botching it over the backing sequencing for a different song. Keith and Ronnie looked at each other, laughed, went 1..2...3..and morphed into the song they were supposed to be playing. I don't think anyone else(60,000 people) noticed. Neil Young Trans Tour. Love Neil, Trans was a mistake. Showed guts there though.