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The Twisted Jackson Family Tree

Posted Wed Feb 18, 2009 10:32am PST by Shawn Amos in GetBack

This just in from the First Family of Crazy: The Jacksons. Marlon Jackson (he's the other child voice in the 1970 single "I'll Be There") has announced plans to develop a slave history theme park along with a Jackson 5 museum within a luxury resort in Nigeria.

"The development will cater to the country's growing tourism industry, particularly African-American tourists who wish to trace their Nigerian roots," according to a recent report in the U.K newspaper The Guardian. "Visitors will be able to explore the site of the former transatlantic slave trade, honour the hundreds of thousands who died in what were horrific human rights abuses, and then head off for a round of golf or a massage, before gawping at animatronic versions of the siblings who sang ABC and I Want You Back."

Whoa.

What was that '80s joke? "There's always a Tito lying around somewhere." I think it's time to check in with the rest of the Jackson clan to see what else they're up to these days.
 

 

 MICHAEL JACKSON
The biggest Jackson family star by a long shot, Michael has sold over 750 million records and is considered by Guinness World Records to be the most successful entertainer of all time. Plus, he's survived a rumored flesh-eating disorder (or at least everything but his nose). Still, he's pretty close to broke and is auctioning off his belongings in April. I hope he saves a few things for Marlon's museum.

 

 

 

 

JERMAINE JACKSON
The bass-playing heartthrob of the group, Jermaine had a brief solo career that included a duet with Pia Zadora. Jermaine is now an international reality-show star. He's been on "Australian Idol," "Celebrity Big Brother UK," and CMT's "Gone Country."

 

 

 

 

 

LaTOYA JACKSON
The middle daughter hasn't had much success professionally or personally. She released some forgettable singles, famously appeared in Playboy, and followed her brother Jermaine into the reality TV black hole. LaToya made her own "Celebrity Big Brother UK" appearance in 2009, then tried to earn some extra cash by charging fans for a meet-and-greet.

 

 

 

 

 MARLON JACKSON
Aside from his Nigerian slave theme park/Jackson 5 museum resort, Marlon plays the real estate game in Southern California. Real estate prices are probably better in Nigeria than California these days.

 

 

 

 

 

 TITO JACKSON
Immortalized by Eddie Murphy ("Tito, get me a tissue"), Tito now plays guitar in his own blues band and manages his sons' group, 3T. According to his website, a new album is expected shortly.

 

 

 

 

 

 JANET JACKSON
The youngest Jackson has starred in two of the all-time coolest '70s and '80s sitcoms: "Good Times" and "Diff'rent Strokes." She could have just stopped there, and her place in history would have been secure. But she made one more legendary TV appearance with Justin Timberlake at Super Bowl XXXVIII. I prefer her in "Good Times." Lately, she's plotting another makeover. Her website is down ("new website coming soon"), and she parted ways with her label, Island Def Jam.

 

 

 

 RANDY JACKSON
No, not that Randy Jackson. This one is the youngest Jackson brother, and he's a long way from "American Idol." He made one album under the name Randy & the Gypsys and now supposedly fixes cars in L.A, according to the New York Post.

 

 

 

 

 

JACKIE JACKSON
Jackie's closest brush with reality-show fame is a rumored affair with Paula Abdul in the '80s. Now he watches his son rap under the name DealZ.

 

 

 

 

 

REBBIE JACKSON
Rebbie is the oldest Jackson child. She had a '80s hit with "Centipede" and played Vegas before retiring. She's the only Jackson to maintain a longtime relationship. She's been married to her high school sweetheart since 1968. Other Jacksons take note.

 

 

 

 

JOSEPH JACKSON
He is the controversial patriarch who led his family to musical domination, then watched them slide into strangeness. He was a boxer, a musician, and a strict disciplinarian (to put it mildly). With no more Jacksons left to manage, Joe announced he was opening a boot camp for up-and-coming hip-hop artists. His goal was to "clean it up." Jackson family values, for sure.

1590 Comments

141. Albert -
I agree, leave it alone

142. Krissy Jewell -
Do you want to know what I say? I believe you all don't have lives if you can't stop this arguing about the Jackson's and about Manson. You should all grow up and let life the way it is. You all are so pathetic. No one wants to read about your pathetic lives and what you have to say. You can say whatever you want to me, you can even ignore me, it's your choice. But let me tell you one thing, if you do that, they know deep down inside that I am right. So enough is enough!

143. flint -
there have been ups and downs, but for all you nerds who sit behind your computers and pop off, you'll never be known for anything, let alone it be good. Losers. keep jacking off behind the scenes.

144. robert -
Did all you people forget that michal jackson is a child molester and should have been put in jail and the rest of the jacksons were loosers living off of michal now no more money they are total loosers. The family is getting Gods pay back and Im very happy

145. anthony b -
yo that picture of rebbie is not a picture of rebbie its just another picture of latoya jackson

146. Carlette -
Thanks...makes my life seem way less despairing

147. jam -
this is not a photo of rebbie.get a grip, whoever put this together.she is a nice lady.

148. sugar -
I love the jacksons

149. Christopher -
(tito get me a tissue) this family has gone through enough. so umm weres momma kate

150. Gerry D -
SCH (comment 20) Consequences are the results of actions. In Jacko's case some very questionable actions. It's difficult to leave it alone when he makes bad judgement decisions. For example, hanging a baby over a railing, any average person would have had children's services all over them and possibly have the kid taken away, and charge with child endangerment. So BOO-HOO poor little Micheal!! On to (comment 5) If Micheal has the money then didn't he pay his staff at Neverland?? Is it because he, like Peter Pan, never grew up and can't handle his responsibilities? And as soon they start to investigate him for possible child molestation, he flees to a country where they can't extredite him. HMMM what a coincidence.
As for the rest of the family, they seem ppretty normal.

151. Yahoo! Music User -
Michael Jackson as an artist with Quincy Jones turned the music industry around in the 80's. Joe Jackson had a vision and proceeded to make it happen in the begining. This too help with race relations. During that time young white and black children listen to the music of the Jackson 5. The entertainment industry either does not let you grow up or makes you grow up too soon. Just remember Michael Jackson could do nothing wrong as long as he was a money making machine. They should have let him grow up, just think of the music he would have made today?

152. RiseUp58 -
Father I pray for those who would glory in exposing the shame of a family rather then pray for them.. Thank you Jacksons for what you were tome as a boy. I am 50 now. Alot has cvhangedin my life. I made many poor choices. I am the least to judge you. God bless all of you. I grew up with Micheal...always wanted to talk with him too.

153. Annie -
To the fool by the nickname taco you are a foolish person, do you know how to sing or dance? Are you a millionaire? No! I don't think so. You maybe jealous. I am so proud of the Jackson family and I know all of the Jackson family members are beautiful people. My Janet she is a beauty queen she is so elegant. So dirty bag go to h. and stop calling the Jackson family freaks.

154. latoya j -
and if yall knew the jacksons yall would know that's REBBIE. "CENTIPEDE" she always looked that way latoya and janet wanted to look like her. do your research!

155. n2fantails -
....the Jac'son Family has yalent yet, unrealized by Joe....yes, you guessed it (it was obvious)...."The Jac'son Family Zoo" where all ya'll can go to watch the day-to-day 'anxtivities' of one of America's strangest and most bizarre entertainment syndicates

156. navajo -
I think the jackson 5 were alright, to bad things did'nt work out for some of them, Janet is the best in the family and the pretty one.Good luck to them alllllllllllllllllllllllll.

157. Fuzzzy -
latoya is a skank, the most succesful in my opinion is Janet, mostly has done it with class

158. zyko monkey -
I LOVE THE JACKSON 5. STILL

159. Nurse Kelsey -
I'm looking at the man in the mirror....We all need to make a change and try to understand that in life, it isn't about any specific affiliation or race...We all bleed red!!! We all need to get along...where else do we have to go?...

160. Rocco -
What a family of FREAKS!
Fame isn't what it's cracked up to be kids!
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