The Britney Economy and the Real Story:
Posted Thu Feb 7, 2008 8:55pm PST by in Jill Sobule and The Provocateurs
I can't believe that I am writing about... Britney Spears. In fact, I never think about her at all. Whenever there is any news item on her, I automatically bypass it. . I think it is the biggest waste of news space ever. It's not that I am too snobby for tabloid scintillation. I admit I have watched the video of Amy Winehouse on the pipe-but I think she is a real talent - thus, I guess, worthy of the youtube hits. Let's me just reiterate and say that ... I don't give a f#&k about Britney Spears.
That being said, I was fascinated be by the recent report on NPR. Britney, herself, still rakes in around $9 million a year. But according to Portfolio magazine, it is "chicken feed compared with the overall Britney economy."
It estimated that a single photo of her can go for up to $100,000 or more - the exclusive bald pictures went for around $500, 000. They calculated that she makes up 20 percent of the paparazzi biz.
Britney was on the cover of the tabloids (US, People, OK!, etc.) 175 times in just 78 weeks. She has also topped the most searched on our Yahoo for six of the last seven years (I still don't get it).
The article concludes by saying the estimated Britney Economy is $110 to $120 million. Dang!
This all got me thinking: Is she a drug addict, bi-polar, or crazy like a fox? Here is my sick fantasy:
The Real Britney
Britney has finally been able to get past the camera flashes to open the front door of her Beverly Hills mansion. But not before she has randomly picked, out of the hordes, a euro-trashed looking Paparazzi named Mario to come inside with her. The door is closed. The media is all abuzz.
Britney: God, Larry that was just awful, wasn't it? Now whose move was it?
(they are in the middle of a serious chess match)
Larry, aka. Mario: How about before we do, I get an audio tape of you, with maybe a Ukrainian accent, acting insane again? That would be good for another $400,000, No?
Britney: A scathingly brilliant idea. Well let's get it over with as I do have a deadline for the Obama speech.
Larry: How is your book on String Theory going?
Britney: Checkmate!
The End
"Fame is proof that the people are gullible."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
A provocateurs quiz: Who said (and in what movie) "A Scathingly Brilliant Idea"?
That being said, I was fascinated be by the recent report on NPR. Britney, herself, still rakes in around $9 million a year. But according to Portfolio magazine, it is "chicken feed compared with the overall Britney economy."
It estimated that a single photo of her can go for up to $100,000 or more - the exclusive bald pictures went for around $500, 000. They calculated that she makes up 20 percent of the paparazzi biz.
Britney was on the cover of the tabloids (US, People, OK!, etc.) 175 times in just 78 weeks. She has also topped the most searched on our Yahoo for six of the last seven years (I still don't get it).
The article concludes by saying the estimated Britney Economy is $110 to $120 million. Dang!
This all got me thinking: Is she a drug addict, bi-polar, or crazy like a fox? Here is my sick fantasy:
The Real Britney
Britney has finally been able to get past the camera flashes to open the front door of her Beverly Hills mansion. But not before she has randomly picked, out of the hordes, a euro-trashed looking Paparazzi named Mario to come inside with her. The door is closed. The media is all abuzz.
Britney: God, Larry that was just awful, wasn't it? Now whose move was it?
(they are in the middle of a serious chess match)
Larry, aka. Mario: How about before we do, I get an audio tape of you, with maybe a Ukrainian accent, acting insane again? That would be good for another $400,000, No?
Britney: A scathingly brilliant idea. Well let's get it over with as I do have a deadline for the Obama speech.
Larry: How is your book on String Theory going?
Britney: Checkmate!
The End
"Fame is proof that the people are gullible."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
A provocateurs quiz: Who said (and in what movie) "A Scathingly Brilliant Idea"?
As for the quote it was Mary in "Trouble with Angels" methinks... I am not really sure but, anyway, it's a movie anybody with half-a-mind should watch...
I live on the other side of the globe and I still can't seem to get away from hearing all about her issues. I can't imagine how much worse it'd be in the States.
I no longer make jokes about Britney because I do not want to be the person who makes the last joke just before she kills herself.
Honestly, I feel sympathy for this "girl-child." Look at her family. My God, it's easy to see where the slope of that line is heading.
I like the String Theory comment. But, honestly, I bet she can not even play checkers, let alone chess. She makes Jessica Simpson look like a Mensa member.
Jill, you had a good mom and you still had your own inner demons. Can you imagine if your mom was constantly grooming you for the attention and adoration of others? I am no prude, but the hyper-sexualization of girls at such a young age is something that I think is really harmful to our whole culture.
Sarte said, "All of psychology can be distilled into two words - childhood decides." When I look at Britney, I can see he was right. My fantasy is that the judge would appoint a Guardian ad litem, a neutral party, like abused kids get - so someone, who has nothing to gain, could help sort out this poor woman's life.