Death and taxes--the only two unavoidables in life. Well, we all enjoyed tax day last month, so it's only natural that we now turn out attention to that other joyous prospect. Now, medical science is reaching that point where it may soon discover how to keep all of us living forever. What that will do to the housing market remains to be seen. But it's sure going to make getting a job as a greeter at Wal-Mart a lot more competitive. Get your resume in early.

"Killed By Death"--Motorhead: I've heard it said that Lemmy from Motorhead is a poet. Who am I to argue? I'm still trying to figure out why a red wheelbarrow is so important. Killed by death seems like the sort of thing that might get you fired if you wrote it on an autopsy report. Could you be a little more specific?

"Dead Souls"--Joy Division: Everything Joy Division ever recorded sounded like it was by someone who was about to crawl into the corner and die. Try making a collection of "feel good" Joy Division tunes and see how far you get. You might get away with an instrumental.

"Death Or Glory"--The Clash: The Clash liked to offer people options, a way out of their predicament. Here you can choose between death or glory. Yet, they assume one equals the other in the end because, according to the lyrics in their song, he who has impure impulses towards religious clergy will eventually convert to that religion's orthodoxy. And they also make the point that bands that last too long get worse. I think they want you to choose death.

"Dead Man"--Josephus: This is one of those rare albums someone gave me years ago because they couldn't handle it. It was too powerful. Or more to the point, the title track, this "Dead Man" song was too long. When you figure that death is forever, is spending 17 minutes thinking about it really that much time in the face of eternity?

"There Is A Light That Never Goes Out"--The Smiths: Perhaps the greatest song ever written about death. "And if a double decker bus crashes into us, to die by your side, such a heavenly way to die, and if a 10 ton truck kills the both of us, to die by your side, the pleasure and privilege is mine." This, from a guy who's trying to convince this other person to take him out that night. I might decide to stay in. What if this guy turned out to be psychic?