Well, Tupac Shakur was sadly slain long ago, but just as the hip-hop icon somehow mysteriously continues to regularly release albums 12 years after his death, the rumors surrounding him are still very much alive and well. For instance, this week the artist formerly known as Puff Daddy/Puffy/P. Diddy/Sean Combs was tenuously linked to a 1994 attack on Tupac, as claimed in a Los Angeles Times online article written by staffer Chuck Philips.

According to FBI accounts cited in Philips' story, Tupac was pistol-whipped and shot four times by two Diddy-associated assailants at a New York recording studio in November '94. This attack purportedly took place during the height of the infamous East Coast/West Coast feud (a feud that eventually culminated in the murder of Diddy's comrade, the Notorious B.I.G.), and was some sort of retaliation for Tupac's alleged refusal to join Diddy's Bad Boy Records roster.

Anyway, this past Monday, Diddy spoke out, vehemently denying the L.A. Times report in the following statement:

"The story is a lie. It is beyond ridiculous and completely false. "Neither [the Notorious B.I.G.] nor I had any knowledge of any attack before, during, or after it happened. I am shocked that the Los Angeles Times would be so irresponsible as to publish such a baseless and completely untrue story."

James Rosemond, who along with James Sabatino was also implicated by Philips in the attack, angrily chimed in as well, calling the story "a libelous piece of garbage" and stating: "In the past 14 years, I have not even been questioned by law enforcement with regard to the assault of Tupac Shakur, let alone brought up on charges. Chuck Philips, the writer...has reached a new low by employing fourth-hand information from desperate jailhouse informants along with ancient FBI reports to create this fabrication. I simply ask for all rap fans and fans of Tupac to analyze this fiction for what it is."

And still, the murders of both Tupac Shakur and Biggie Smalls remain unsolved.

In other feud news, a resolution has been reached in the bitter divorce battle between Paul McCartney and his infamous ex, Heather Mills, aka the woman with the highest-paying non-job in show business. Yes, Heather certainly held a plum position during her four-year marriage to Macca, a position that actually paid about $1,400 an hour. See, if you divide her newly bequeathed $48.7 million divorce settlement by those scant four years, that's about what her hourly wage comes to. Wow, nice work if you can get it--we here at That's Really Week will have to search for "Beatle Wife" in HotJobs later and see if there are any openings! Seems this job has a fabulous and generous severance package too, since Heather will receive a lovely McCartney mansion in London along with her multimillion-dollar payday. Wow. Guess money can't buy Paul love, but it can get his ex-wife just about everything else. Unsurprisingly, Heather told courthouse reporters that she was "very, very, very pleased" with the judge's decision.

One celebrity spouse who'd stand to make a pretty profit in divorce court is Guy Ritchie. He'd certainly be a Ritchie rich! (Heh heh...) But according to the spokesperson for his famous (and famously wealthy) wife, the position of "Madonna Husband" has not yet been vacated. See, after rumors of the Material Girl's eminent divorce were spread by U.K. tabloid The Sun--and after Guy was suspiciously a no-show at Madonna's Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame induction last week--the publicist for the recently crowned Forbes "cash queen of music" went into damage-control overdrive, insisting that the Ritchies' marriage is still true blue. "I am delighted to confirm that Mr. and Mrs. Guy Ritchie remain happily married," Liz Rosenberg announced in a statement. "All is well and wonderful in the Ritchie household." Phew. We here at That's Really Week wish the Ritchies many more blissful years of making straight-to-Netflix movies and adopting African orphans together.

And finally, in other death-related news, this week marked the sad, untimely, and altogether bizarre passing of ABBA drummer Ola Brunkert, who perished in an almost Spinal Tap-drummer-like freak accident at his Mallorca home. According to authorities, Ola inadvertently slashed his own throat when he fell through a glass door. He apparently attempted to stop the blood flow with a towel, and ran outside for help, but unfortunately he collapsed in his garden and was found there, dead, hours later.

It was undoubtedly a horrible way to go, but we're hoping Ola's memory will be kept alive in the happiest manner possible, via the effervescently feelgood ABBA recordings on which he kept rhythm, such as "Waterloo," "Fernando," "Take A Chance On Me," and "Dancing Queen."

And on that bummer note, thus concludes another wild, weird, and woeful week. Do come back next Friday, and until then...goodnight, and good music.

THIS WEEK'S TOP 10 STORIES:

1) Did Diddy Do It? - Diddy is linked to a 1994 attack on his former East Coast/West Coast foe, Tupac.

2) Take The Money And Limp - Heather Mills McCartney gets $48.7 million in divorce court.

3) Madonna's Marriage Still True Blue - Madge denies rumors of her own impending divorce.

4) Mamma Mia! - ABBA's drummer dies in a freak accident.

5) Grand Ole Idol - Carrie Underwood gets an invitation to join the Opry.

6) Osmond Family Reunion - Donny & Marie will appear on prime-time TV together for the first time in eight years.

7) A Star Is Born - X Factor winner Leona Lewis makes her U.S. television debut on Oprah.

8) Suin' USA - The Beach Boys finally reach a settlement over use of their band name.

9) Raconteurs In A Rush - Jack White's side band decides to release its second album...next week!

10) Gnarls Barkley Make A "Run" For It - The duo rush-releases its sophomore album as well, moving up the street date by three whole weeks.