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Top 10 Rock & Roll Moustaches

Posted Tue Jun 3, 2008 3:28pm PDT by Robert of the Radish in The Y! Music Playlist Blog

The moustache (or mustache) is the most difficult facial hair configuration to pull off. And for the musician it shows a daring and individuality not common to an industry obsessed with "image." For this list I wanted to select the top 10 moustaches in rock & roll history.

When thinking about who should make the list I set some parameters as follows:

1. The moustache had to be the central feature of the artist's facial hair - jazz dots, lambchops or unconnected goatees were acceptable as long as the stache stood out as a separate entity. Full beard and moustache packages were disqualified since a full face of man-hair is a completely different image.

2. This list is the top 10 ROCK & ROLL moustaches -- I have not considered r&b, country, funk, jazz, hip-hop, classical or other distinct genres outside of rawk. I admit Jim Croce may have been a borderline selection on this point, but I've heard his music many times on classic rock radio. And besides, his lip-beaver had its own zip code.

3. Not only did the mouthbrows have to be memorable, but the artist's music had to be too. A great moustache alone was not enough to get you on the list, you should have also reached the rank of "legend" or at least "household name" to be considered. Sorry, GG Allin.

4. Finally, each artist had to be known for their moustache -- since artists tend to change their look frequently I chose to include only those who had kiss-whiskers for extended periods of time. In other words, each clambrush selected is instantly recognizeable as part of an identifiable "look" - Sorry, Prince and Melissa Etheridge.

And so I present...

The Top 10 Rock & Roll Moustaches

10. Carlos Santana

Carlos Santana certainly falls into the category of musical legend and although his cookieduster is on the well-groomed and understated side, it has been a constant companion throughout the course of his career. Carlos makes the number 10 spot in our list because he has worn a standard stache with pride and without the clutter of competing facial hair for decades.

 

 

9. Jimi Hendrix

Jimi Hendrix probably wore his fur horseshoe better than any rock & roller in the history of the rock moustache. His stache's elegant curves in combination with a well-rounded afro and thick eyebrows helped craft a distinct and instantly recognizable image. It is notable to say that Jimi's nose-skirt never took center stage -- his moustache may not come to mind when thinking about him, but it was there. Luckily, it was his guitar playing that stole the show.

 

 

8. Duane Allman

Duane Allman is only one of two entries in the top 10 that include a total lampchop/stache combo. The absence of chin and neck whiskers give the impression of a moustache on steroids. This in combination with his long hair parted down the middle gave Duane's face a slender and unique look that will be remembered for eons, as will the music he was able to create in his short 24 years upon the earth.

 

 

7. Ted Nugent

As images of Ted Nugent over the decades attest, he's had an on again/off again affair with his nosebeard over the years, but the cover of his seminal album Cat Scratch Fever memorializes his philtrum bush at its heroic peak. The long, fuzzy, unkempt hair, wily stache, elevated eyebrows, chipmunk teeth and maniacal eyes all contribute to what is arguably the greatest moustache-centric rock & roll album cover of all time.

 

 

6. Lemmy Kilmister

Lemmy enters at number 6 with our second lambchop/stache combo. The way the left side of his stache dips and gracefully curves around his gravity-producing carbuncles is as close to art as facial hair can get. Undoubtedly, Lemmy's mutton chop moustache is as integral to his image as his gravelly voice is to the music of Motörhead. His glorious nosebush is the perfect companion for the "dirtiest rock n' roll band in the world."

 

 

5. David Crosby

David Crosby is, without any doubt, the rock star that most closely resembles a walrus. His wire-like facial hair has evolved over the years to help the singer locate crustaceans as he swims along the bottom of the California surf. It's a little known fact that CSN almost went by the name Moustache, Stills & Nash but the band could not fit the name on the album cover of their 1969 self-titled debut.

 

 

4. John Oates

Have you ever seen John Oates of Hall & Oates fame without his moustache? Well, I have and it's just plain wrong! John Oates without his face weasel is much like what your cat looks like after you shave it. Although Hall & Oates have been shunned by the testosterone laden rock fan set, the duo have scored an incredible 7 platinum and 6 gold records in their long career. And that moustache was front and center during the whole MTV video revolution.

 

 

3. Jim Croce

Ok, ok, I understand the arguments about Jim Croce not falling into the "rock & roll" category, but I made an executive decision on this one. Not only to include him, but to put him at the #3 spot! Although well known for his folksy acoustic guitar, Croce could indeed rock, as heard on hits like "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown". And oh that moustache! Most don't know that before Jim Croce made it big he had a good career as a model for the Nose & Moustache Disguise company who invented the world famous disguise of the same name.

 

2. Freddie Mercury

Let's face it, Freddie Mercury without his schnozzle-fuzz would have looked like nothing more than an accountant in a tight jumpsuit and cape. But with his perfectly groomed and squared moustache he became the sexually ambiguous superhero that helped make Queen's live show an event to rival the greatest on earth. Freddie will be remembered for all time, and when we close our eyes and think of him, we will visualize that glorious stache.

 

 

1. Frank Zappa

Choosing many of the previous artists in this list took some careful consideration, but there was never any doubt about who would claim the number one spot. Frank Zappa's distinctively huge moustache, in combination with his oversized soul patch, is so identifiable to the man that his estate holds a trademark on the look (no joke). The style of his creative loin-tickler even carries the name "The Zappa" after the man who made it famous. So as a respected musician well ahead of his time whose moustache style carries his name, Frank Zappa's stache is the #1 greatest rock & roll moustache in history.

Aside: I have used many slang terms for the moustache in this column, let me know which was your favorite and please add any others you've heard to the comments.

217 Comments

101. Drakala -
Derek Smalls Of Spinal Tap !

102. Margo -
hahahaha Zappa!!!!

103. Jennifer -
Where are the Beatles? Part of what made Sgt. Pepper so epic was the debut of their new look with moustaches.

104. Batman1960 -
What about Eric Clapton....Rod Price from Foghat...and since you have others with beards why not ZZ Top

105. bud w -
zappa is the man

106. Matt -
Great list, glad Croce got on it. I do have to ask about Lynott, though. However, I had to find someone else's response first as I'm a huge Lizzy fan and always find myself making sure my personal enjoyment of the Godfather of Irish Rock doesn't overshadow the reality of his place in the Rock Pantheon.

107. Eaglesfan87 -
This guy's lists are always lame. This one is a perfect example and shows he doesn't do much research when he makes these lists up. A list of famous 'staches should have ZZ Top at #1 and this guy didn't even include them?! And what about James Hetfield? He's only one of the most successful rockstars of the last 15 or 20 years.

108. JeffB -
Jeff Baxter was the first that came to me.

I always think of the Doobies first though, even though he was a founding member of Steely Dan.

109. Rock -
Freddie Mercury - A true legend.
Really agree with this list.

110. Gary -
zappa... number one without a doubt.... i was waiting for him best music also

111. William -
Mustache list wihtout the Beatles Sgt. Peppers? Are you kidding?

112. m&m -
i know they dont play rock 'n roll, but the people in System of a Down all have amazing hair! ♥♥♥♥♥

113. m&m -
this is a graet list

114. Sarah F -
Jimi Hendrix Rox!!!!!

115. d.s. -
what about tom fogerty???he had the stash all through c.c.r.'s career.

116. Shannon -
I am desperately trying to get info on the older song, sung by maybe Tupac, called The Funky Co-Medina. Anyone out there familiar wih this tune? Please give info on where it can be found, as in, which CD I should buy to get the song.

Any help would be appreciated. Thanks in advance. Shannon Stoner

117. GK -
Did anyone mention Derek Smalls of Spinal Tap fame?

118. da chief -
Jeff "Skunk" Baxter is a Doobie Brother, not with Steely Dan.

119. Yahoo! Music User -
It said if Freddie didn't have the moustache he would have just looked like an accountant with a tight jumpsuit and a cape which is not the case. He wore those tight jumpsuits in the 70's when he started getting famous and he didn't have the moustache. However he had longer hair and wore eyeliner and black nail polish. I've read that he was one of the first musicians to do that. Freddie rocks! RIP

120. Carolyn -
All pretty good guys except one - TED NUGENT can kiss my a**. What a JERK.
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